Things That Confuse Me: Part 1 of a Seemingly Infinite List

The world really is a confusing place. You see everywhere people are saying "oh we are molding future leaders of the world" or other things that promote leadership over all other qualities. Don't they realise that if everyone becomes leaders, there will be no one left to follow their orders?

Why do people call vegetarians veggies? Veggies is short for vegetables, therefore vegetarians eat veggies, therefore vegetarians can't be veggies or else they'll be cannibals! And vegetarians can't eat other vegetarians unless my whole life has been nothing but a giant lie because people are the oddest sort of plant I ever heard of.

It's so funny how around the start of the semester I keep hearing people say things like "well, back to real life!" That's adorable, do they actually think college constitutes as a real life?

Everyone in my house is old, they rely on healthy food to live. I'm kind of sick of healthy food, it's literally making me sick. I need junk food. Who cares about preserving my body until old age if I won't even get to eat my favourite foods. Then there's just no point to adding that extra mile if you ask me.

The lives of endangered species must be tough. They get holed up in these facilities where people are constantly monitoring you and making sure you can fuck and have babies. But what sort of purposeless life is that? Has anyone even sat down with one of these animals and really asked and listened to what they actually want to do with their lives?

I don't understand why it takes women so long to go to the bathroom in public places. It's not that difficult ladies, pull down your pants, take a leak, wipe, pull it back up, done! That should only take like a minute tops unless you're taking a shit and who takes shits in public places? Leave that sort of intimacy at home people, come on, have some dignity.

Why do people still wear crocs? Whenever I see people wearing crocs, my first impression of them is "please I don't ever want to have sex ever" But I suppose they're going to need all the comfort they can get considering a lonely life with nothing but cats to give them warmth sounds kind of tough.